New progress

For some strange reason, the library does not have any books available about non-profits or grant-writing. There are plenty of books listed; they are all checked out. Many books are overdue. I don't understand the phenomena. Is it an omen?

Well, there are resources online, at least. I have begun to look into the steps I need to take, and have set some goals. I have decided that I want to open the daycare/preschool September 2007. It's a rather ambitious goal that really depends entirely on whether I can get grants by the beginning of summer.

Accordingly, my goals are to file the incorporation documents by the end of January, and complete grant-writing by the end of March.

I got very excited about my new goals, but have also been sort of scared too. Can I really do this? I thought I had the support of a couple of people that ended up not being on the same page with me after all. I have thoughts running through my head like: Who do I think I am? If this is such a splendid idea, why isn't someone else doing it already? Have I been shut in my house for too long and am slipping away from reality? And then there are the thoughts that panic me: What will I do if this doesn't work out? What will I do if no one wants to put their kids in my school? Will I have to get a "real job" and put my kids in school?

It's all very scary, but I don't know what I should do with my fear. Hopefully, one day I will be able to look back on this and breathe a deep sigh of relief.